Friday, April 30, 2010

"Floating on the Sea of Aspirations"

An amazing observation in Quantum theory: Light, depending on how you look at it, can be seen and measured as either particle (photons) or wave, at the same time.

That has randomly come to mind this evening. I've been thinking a lot, lately (enough, in fact, to finally write a freakin new entry for the bloggo :), on a mental image of sorts that came to mind during my 420 week.. (Ha Just follow me)

I had been thinking on what it is to have dreams and aspirations, what it is to seek Truth and wisdom, or to otherwise set any other goal. Not the goodness or badness of such things.. But the nature of them.. What it is, this force that so eagerly pulls us in by urging every man and even every child into having a dream to focus on - a light at the end of some tunnel. I've deliberated on this for some reason for quite a while, now.. One of those random things where there might have been a thought in a dream, or a whisper of a lusty secret to life, or anything.. The point is, it ended up being the thought that every song, inspirational tweet or conscious word brought to my mind via this image. After a while it seemed to lend a visual to yet another facet of my perspective.. You'll forgive me if in my following attempt to portray this image here I horribly fail.. Ha. If this is so then I hope at least that you see the idea behind my words.

Picture a man on a boat on the sea. See this man ride the open waters, solely focused on and directed toward the light of this impossibly bright star. It is a cold night and the waters churn but even at his most desperate he pushes that damned boat through those seas, guided by his aspiration. His Light. Be it fame or fortune or Truth or happiness, or Love or religion; man is born to seek out and bask in his own Light. Imagine if you will, this man on this boat (I'd recommend applying your Selves to this mental image - me, personally, I see this Moses-like character ha), in this cold, dark night, standing fast against forceful winds with malicious and bitter intentions, that blow only to drive him away from his Light and his Way. To be enfolded and caressed into death by the darkness. Look upon this cold and lonely and battered man with all the love and compassion and respect that you (ought) pay yourSelf for the travels on your seas for all of your years.

Now, as this image develops within you, consider all that there is that you are impassioned by, and on those nights when there's nothing but darkness that surrounds you, is it not too your Star that you look to for direction? For Hope? For your next heartbeat? Recall how Focused you were/are on that Light - as only a plant knows to love the Sun, you know to love your Star. So your eyes become transfixed, as do those of the man battling those seas. And in contrast with the light of his loftiest ambitions, the world surrounding him falls ever darker and more sinister..

But here's the thing - as we step back from the plight of this weathered man to gain some new perspective, there's something to note that perhaps he cannot. As you step back and look upon the waters surrounding him, they seem much less sinister... Indeed, these waters are not as murky as he sees, and in fact reflect all the light of his beloved, in every direction surrounding him.. And lo! The winds blow and fill his sails and serve to unnerve and displace, but not to his demise and utter undoing - he has even learned to better control and navigate.

I remember when I was 7 years old I decided what I wanted with my life. I didn't want to be famous, not being the largest fan of the idea. All I wanted.. Well, was to be omniscient. Ha! I wanted to know "every single thing there is to Know" when I grew up. It's a pretty big driving force to who I am and how I come to understand things. So this image of sorts (that I really wish I could paint) has hit me pretty sideways as perhaps a notice of some sort of growth in my thinking: If Truth is my Star, then I'll sail these seas for all of my years in pursuit of that devotion, never thinking to look around on the seas I traverse to see and be amongst all that I've sought - Truth(, Love,Faith Happiness - insert drug of choice, here) shines refracted on the lick of every splash and wave these waters hold.

And in the end your Light is just like a mirage, anyway - a ghost of your hopes of a brighter daylight in the seemingly not too far distance. The Oasis in the desert is a figment of your imagination based on the manipulations of your deepest desperations on misconstrued visual information, and as you step closer and reach out, it dissolves away into the sands of all that is and all that has ever been. So too is it with the man and his Star - to try to grasp it means to clasp only the waters that surround him.

And I think that's a pretty damned Beautiful thing.

That Light isn't meant to be captured and imprisoned - it is You, and it is Free - forever and brilliantly reflected as the Light that guides you along your Way. And as you come to meet your aspirations and Grow, so too shall the Light within that guides and further illuminates the waters you float upon. So - I guess the point of this whole exercise is to say... Well, look around, not just forward and certainly not just backward..

Just Look..
It's the most amazing thing, Ever, no?

Your Light touches Everything.